Nakwitwara nte mu gihe ntangiye kugirira amarangamutima y’urukundo inshuti yanjye?

Ushobora kuba wibaza icyo wakora mu gihe utangiye kugirira ibyiyumvo bidasanzwe inshuti yawe, amarangamutima y’urukundo ni ikintu gikomeye cyane, ntabwo ugomba kuyakerensa. Usanga abenshi wibaza niba umwanzuro mwiza ari ukubwiza inshuti yawe ukuri ku buryo wiyumva, cyangwa niba wakwicecekera.

Abenshi batinya kuvuga ukuri kubera ubwoba bw’uko ubucuti bafitanye bushobora kwangirika mu gihe iby’urukundo bidashobotse. Dore icyo wakora mu gihe utangiye kugirira amarangamutima y’urukundo incuti yawe nk’uko tubikesha ikinyamakuru Wiki How:

Menya ibyiyumvo byawe nyakuri: Akenshi gukunda inshuti yawe ni ibintu byoroshye cyane, ariko ugomba kubanza kumenya niba koko ayo marangamutima ari aya nyayo cyangwa niba ari ukubera izindi mpamvu.

Ushobora kuba umaze igihe utandukanye n’umukunzi wawe, cyangwa ufite ibindi bibazo maze kubera ukuntu inshuti yawe ikwitayeho, ugatangira kumva uyigiriye ibyiyumvo bidasanzwe. Ibi rero bitandukanye n’urukundo nyarwo. Ni ngomwa rero kubanza kubiha igihe, ukamenya koko niba urwo rukundo ari urwa nyarwo.

Hari ibimenyetso byinshi byerekana ko ushobora kuba ukunda inshuti yawe by’ukuri nk'uko byatangajwe na Dr. Sabrina Romanoff, inzobere mu by'imitekerereze ya muntu akaba n'umwarimu muri kaminuza ya Yeshiva mu mujyi wa New York. Niba bimwe muri ibi bijya bikubaho, ushobora kuba koko ukunda incuti yawe by’ukuri:

Muri ibyo harimo gufuha mu gihe inshuti yawe ivuze iby’urukundo rwayo n’abandi, uhora ushaka kumarana umwanya munini nawe, kandi umubona nk’umuntu wihariye kuri wowe kuruta abandi bo kandi, uhora ushaka kumenya amakuru yabo, akenshi ubabwira uko umeze, uko umunsi wawe wagenze, uhora uhangayikishijwe no kumenya uko bakuona n’uko bagufata.

Nyuma y’ibi noneho ushobora gutekereza ku kubwiza ukuri inshuti yawe, ikamenya uko wiyumva. Ni ngombwa guhitamo igihe cyiza ndetse n’ahantu heza, hatuje, maze ukamubwiza ukuri, mukabiganiraho byimbitse. Niba kandi umubwiye uko wiyumva, nawe ugomba kumuha umwanya ukumva uko abyumva kandi ukubaha umwanzuro we. 

Na none kandi ugomba kwitegura kwakira igisubizo cyose uri buhabwe. Igihe usanze uko wiyumva ari ko bimeze no ku nshuti yawe, ni byiza cyane, iki gihe noneho mushobora gutangira urugendo rwanyu mu rukundo. 

Nyamara niba usanze atari ko bimeze, ugomba kwihangana, ndetse ugakomeza ubuzima. Ni ngombwa kubaha umwanzuro w’inshuti yawe mu gihe ikubwiye ko bidashoboka. 

Nyuma rero niba iby’urukundo bidakunze, ikintu ugomba gushyira imbere y’ibindi byose ni ibyishimo byawe, ugomba gufata umwanya wo gukira ndetse ukagaruka mu buzima bwawe busanzwe, ukaganira n’inshuti wizeye, umuntu wo mu muryango wawe, cyangwa umuganga, ni byiza kandi ko ukora ibishoboka byose kugira ngo wiyiteho kugira ngo bitakuviramo no kurwara indwara z’agahinda gakabije.