NKORE IKI: Namuteye indobo none nsigaye mwiyumvamo!

Hari abantu benshi rero bafite ikibazo gikomeye, ushobora kuba hari umuntu wateye indobo, ariko noneho ukaba usigaye umwiyumvamo. Ntabwo ibi ari ibidasanzwe, bishobora guterwa n’impamvu zitandukanye hamwe n’impinduka zigenda zibaho mu buzima.

Dore uko wakwitwara mu gihe uteye indobo umusore, nyuma ukaza kwisanga umukunda, nk’uko tubikesha evanmarckatz.com:  

Mbere na mbere ugomba kubanza kuzirikana ko umusore ajya kuza kugusaba ko mukundana yabitekerejeho igihe kirekire, ikirenzeho kandi aba yifitiye n’icyizere ko bicamo. Iyo rero umusubije inyuma, ukanga icyifuzo cye, arababara cyane. Nyamara kuba nyuma watangira kumwiyumvamo, si ikosa gusa ugomba kumenya ko nawe ashobora kuba atakigukunda nka mbere.

Ushobora kuba waramuhakaniye kubera impamvu runaka, wenda warumvaga utamukunda ku buryo yakubera umukunzi, hari imyitwarire runaka umuziho itari myiza, utinya guhemukirwa mu rukundo, ufite ubwoba cyangwa ibindi byinshi. 

Hari abasore rero bumva oya nyine bakayifata nka oya wavuze ubihagazeho, wabitekerejeho kandi ukomeje, aba bubaha umwanzuro w’abandi kabone n’ubwo waba ubabangamiye. 

Umusore umeze uku rero ntabwo wahita uza ngo umubwire uti: “noneho niteguye kukubera umukunzi.” Ushobora gusanga yarakomeje ubuzima, yarakwibagiwe, cyangwa se yarabonye undi mukunzi, ni byiza rero kudahubuka.

Hari n’abandi basore batava ku izima, urabahakanira ariko bagakomeza kukwandikira, bakaza kukureba, ndetse bagakomeza kukwitaho. Aba baba bifuza ko wahindura ibitekerezo byawe maze ukabemera. 

Nyamara kandi, aba nabo bashobora rimwe na rimwe kugira amakenga, bibaza icyahindutse gituma uhindura umwanzuro wawe. Ntabwo rero bivuze ko niba yarakomeje kukugaragariza urukundo, bizakorohera guhita ujya mu rukundo nawe, ngo ni uko usigaye umukunda gusa. 

Birumvikana ko uhangayitse, wibaza niba wabimubwira maze mugatangira urugendo rwanyu, ariko na none ufite ubwoba ko atakigukunda. Ugomba rero kubiha umwanya, ukabanza ukamenya niba koko akigufitiye amarangamutima y’urukundo, cyangwa niba yariyakiriye agakomeza ubuzima.

Mu gihe yakomeje ubuzima biragoye kongera kumugarura mu murongo wo kugukunda, niba ufashe umwanzuro nk’uyu menya ko harimo imbogamizi nyinshi ndetse amahirwe menshi ari uko ushobora gusanga uyu musore atakikubona nka mbere atanagishishikajwe no gukundana nawe. Mu gihe bigenze uku rero, komera kandi wihangane.

Na none kandi mu gihe umusore wakatiye akikugaragariza urukundo, ni byiza. Aha uba ufite amahirwe yo kuza umeze nk’aho wemera icyifuzo cye maze bikakorohera. Nyamara hari n’abandi bakomeza kukwitaho, ariko mu by'ukuri atari amarangamutima y’urukundo abibakoresha, ahubwo ari nk’uburyo bwo kukwiyegereza mu rwego rwo kugira ngo niba mutabashije gukundanam byibuze mube inshuti.

Iyo bimeze uku rero, ni byiza kwitonda, ushobora kugaruka usanga umusore atakigukeneyeho urukundo, ahubwo akubona nk’inshuti ye bisanzwe.

Ni byiza kumenya ko urukundo rwuzuyemo amayobera menshi, uyu munsi ukunda umuntu, ubona nawe yagukundaga, ariko wamusaba urukundo, akagutera indobo. Utera umuntu indobo, nyuma y’igihe ugatangira kumukunda, ibi byose ni ibisanzwe mu buzima, ariko icya mbere ni ukumenya uburyo ubyitwaramo.