Sobanukirwa indwara yo gufuha n’uburyo wayirinda umwana kuva akiri muto

Abaganiriye n’Inyarwanda bavuga ibitandukanye kuri iki kibazo ubusanzwe batanazi ko ari uburwayi kuko bavuga ko ari amarangamutima menshi umuntu aba aterwa no gukunda cyane bigatuma yumva yakwiharira uwo akunda, abandi bakavuga ko ari ukutizerana bituma umuntu ahora ahangayikiye ko uwo akunda yakora ikosa akamuca inyuma.

Uwera (izina twamuhaye) yagize ati “Akenshi iyo utamwizeye uhora uhagaritse umutima bigatuma ukora n’ibikorwa bisa nko kumugenzura kandi abenshi nanjye ndimo biratubangamira.”

Hari n’abavuga ko gufuha bishobora gukorwa cyane n’abantu baca inyuma abakunzi babo bigatuma yumva ko ibyo abamo na mugenzi we yabikora akajya amufuhira.

Uretse ababona ko abafuha babiterwa no gukora ibidakwiriye cyangwa kutizerana hari n’ababibona nk’ikintu kizana mu muntu atanabasha kwiyima ariko ngo akenshi kigaterwa no kumva wakwiharira uwo ukunda ukabigaragaza mu buryo burenze urugero kuko utaba ubasha kubicunga.

Inzobere mu mitekerereze ya muntu (Psychologie) ndetse no mu by’imikorere n’imihindagurikire ijyanye n’ibitsina (Sexologie) Albert Gakwaya, mu kiganiro yagiranye na Kigali today avuga ko gufuha ari ibintu bisanzwe, ariko hakaba n’igihe bigera aho bikaba indwara, kandi ko habaho ikintu gisanzwe bita gufuha ku bantu bose bakundana, cyangwa icyo ukunze ukumva wakigenzura.

Ati “Hakabaho no gufuha bihinduka indwara, bimwe umuntu abuza undi amahoro, bigaturuka ku cyizere gike nyir’ugufuha yigiramo, bituma yumva atari ku rugero rwo kuba yaba ari kumwe na wa wundi afuhira. Ibyo rero iyo bikabije bigera aho bikaba bibi, bikica umuryango, cyangwa umwe mu bagize umuryango akabera undi umutwaro.”

Akomeza agira ati “Ni uburwayi buturuka ku gufuha, bukunda kugirwa n’abantu bataye icyizere ubwabo. Hari ugufuha kurenze ku buryo bigira nyir’ubwite umurwayi wo mu mutwe, bikamutera kujya arota cyangwa yibwiriza ko mugenzi we hari ukundi kuntu bigenda ku ruhande batari kumwe.”

Albert Gakwaya avuga ko akenshi na kenshi biba ku muntu nawe udafite umutuzo ku bw’utuntu agira ku ruhande, nk’umuntu uca inyuma mugenzi we, noneho akaba afite ishusho mu mutwe y’uko abikora, akibagirwa y’uko ari we bibaho gusa, akibwira ko na wa mugenzi we akora nk’uko nguko.

Ati “Icyo gihe uko amubonye asuhuza undi, bihita bimwibutsa ka kajisho areba wa muntu we, ko na we ari ko abigenza. Atekereza ibyo we afite mu mutwe we akabishyira ku wundi, bityo bikaba byanaba n’ubumuga. Icyo gihe mu rugo biba byatangiye kumera nabi. Iyo umuntu afushye akenshi nta na rimwe biza byizanye ari ibisanzwe.”

Avuga kandi ko hari ibituruka ku ko umuntu yabayeho mu myaka ibiri ya mbere akivuka, ko hari igihe umwe mu babyeyi be yitwara nabi, ntafashe wa mwana kuzigiramo icyizere, noneho bikazatuma wa muntu agira ikibazo gikomeye.

Agira inama ababyeyi ko mu gihe bonsa abana babo, bajya babaterura ku buryo babareba mu maso, bakabaganiriza, bakabitaho mu buryo bwose bashoboye, ku buryo nibagenda bakaza kugaruka, bongera kubikora, bityo bakarema icyizere mo umwana, akumva ko yizeye ko kugenda k’umubyeyi we bidatuma amutakaza burundu, ko ahubwo agaruka akiri uwe.

Abitandukanya na wa mubyeyi wonsa umwana yiruka, atamwitayeho, akagaruka atinze atanamwitayeho akavuga ko uwo mwana akurana impamyi zo kumva ko ugiye wese amukunze atari bugaruke, akumva ko uwo azaba afiteho uruhare wese azamurinda kugira ngo atamuhomba nk’uko yabuze umubyeyi we.