Urukundo rurihariye kandi rusaba kumva ndetse no kurwitaho ugira ngo rubeho kandi ruhore ari rwiza. Hari imbuga nyinshi zigira inama abagore ku buryo basigasira ndetse bagakora ibikwiye mu rukundo ariko ugasanga ntihibazwa icyo umugabo akunda n’icyo yanga.
Ubusanzwe ntibikunze kubaho ko umugabo avuga icyo
ashaka nk’uko umugore abigenza mu rukundo. Ibi bituma hari ibyo umugore
ashobora gukorera umukunzi we akababara kuko atabikunda na cyane ko umugabo
wese aba yibaza ko twe abagore dukwiye kuba tuzi ibyo bashaka.
Muri iyi nkuru rero, Umunyamakuru wa INYARWANDA
agiye kubafasha kureba bimwe mu byo abagabo baba bakeneye mu rukundo bibafasha
kubona ibitekerezo by’ibikwiye mwakora n’ibyo mwakwirinda mu rukundo bikabafasha
guhora muryohewe kandi urukundo rwanyu
rukaramba.
1.Abagabo bakunda kumvwa no guhabwa umwanya
Ikintu kibi cyane ndetse kibabaza umugabo bikabije
ni ugutekereza ko umukobwa bakundana cyangwa umugore we atamwumva. Reka dufate
urugero aho umugabo yaba ari gukora ibishoboka byose ngo agire ibibazo akemura
nk’aho biba bigoye maze umugore akamwitura inabi. Aha asigara yibaza icyo
yakora ngo akemure ikibazo ufite kuko iyo utari no kubona agaciro k’ibyo akora
bimuca intege kandi abona ko utamwumva na gato. Mwumve kandi umuhe umwanya wo
gufatanya nawe mu gukemura ibibazo mu gihe abikeneye.
2.Ntugashake guhora ku isonga! Nawe akeneye
kwitabwaho
Akenshi usanga mu rukundo kwitabwaho kose, ibyibanze
byose ari umugore. Ibyo bakeneye cyangwa se amarangamutima yabo bigahora
bishyirwa imbere iteka. Yego abagabo barabikora ndetse
bakanagaragaza ko ntacyo bibatwaye ariko si uko ntacyo biba bibatwaye koko
burya uzabaze umugabo wawe cyangwa umusore mukundana uko ameze, umwiteho,
umubaze icyo wamufasha cyangwa icyo wamukorera. Yego ntutegetswe kumuheka
cyangwa gusoma ubutaka agendaho ariko byibuze umwereke ko umwitayeho,
umutekerezaho atari we ugomba guhora akwitaho gusa ngo uhore ku isonga kuko
nawe akeneye kwitabwaho.
3.Ntukamupfushe ubusa
Niba umusore mukundana ari muzima, azahora agerageza
kumarana igihe kinini nawe ngo arusheho kukugira umukobwa wishimye mu rukundo.
Birakwiye ko rero nawe utabipfusha ubusa ngo wumve ko ari inshingano ze
bisanzwe kuko hari abitwa ko bari mu rukundo ariko batabayeho gutyo bahora
babyifuza gusa banabirota. Jya ubyishimira ndetse nawe ubimushimire kuko nahora
abona ibyo agukorera utabiha agaciro bizateza ibibazo ndetse azanarekera kuko
atazaba yumva akamaro kabyo. Jya umushimira kuko ntibitwara igihe kinini erega!
Kandi akantu gato katanagoye gashobora kubura hakavuka ibibazo bikomeye
byanageza urukundo rwanyu ku ndunduro.
4.Iga kumvikana no guhinduka
Kugira utwo mutumvikanaho birashoboka mu rukundo
ikibi ni ukurwana ntimukiranuke. Inzira ya mbere yo kugabanya intonganya ni
ukumvikana ndetse ukiga no guhinduka na cyane ko abagore biba bikwiye ko
bagandukira abagabo. Niwiga guca bugufi ukumvikana n’umukunzi wawe intonganya
zizaba nke ndetse umukunzi wawe azahora yishimiye ko umucira bugufi cyane kuko
abagabo barabikunda.
5.Mushyire muri gahunda zawe
Usanga akenshi abakobwa bumva ko bakora gahunda zabo
batabwiye abasore bakundana nyamara bagahora bashaka kumenya gahunda z’abakunzi
babo. Niba wifuza kubaka rugakomera, umusore mukundana mushyire muri gahunda
muhuze umurongo kandi ugaragaze ko udatewe ipfunwe no gukundana nawe,
umugaragaze mu bandi, ntuterwa ikimwaro no guhamya ko muri mu rukundo.
Bizamushimisha kandi bimwereke ko uri uwe kandi wenyine.
Hari byinshi wakora ndetse na byinshi wakirinda mu
rukundo ngo rurusheho kuba rwiza. Iyi twayita nk’intangiriro nziza, ubashije
gushobora ibi waba urwubatse neza wagereranwa n’uwubatse ku rutare, kuko ni
gake umusore mukundana azakubwira ibyo ashaka ko ukora. Ukwiye rero kwibwiriza
ibikwiye.
TANGA IGITECYEREZO