Icyo wakora kugira ngo wikuremo uwo mwahoze mukundana

Abantu benshi bagorwa no kwikuramo abo bahoze bakundana, hari abo bifata ibyumweru, amezi cyangwa imyaka bitewe n’impamvu zitandukanye. Mu gihe rero urukundo rwanyu rutagishoboye gukomeza, ugomba kumenya ko kubabara ni ibintu bisanzwe ariko nyuma y’agahinda ubuzima bukomeza umuntu akiyakira maze agatangira ubuzima bushya.

Abajyanama benshi mu by’urukundo batanga inama zitandukanye ku bintu byagufasha kwikuramo uwo mwahoze mukundana, dore uko ugomba kwitwara mu gihe kwikuramo uwo mwahoze mukundana bikugoye nk’uko tubikesha inyandiko yasohotse mu kinyamakuru Psychology Today:

Guhita wikuramo uwo mwahoze mukundana ntabwo ari ikintu kibaho mu ijoro rimwe gusa, ahubwo ni inzira ndende. Buri munsi ni intambwe igana imbere, kandi uko iminsi yicuma, bigenda byoroha.

Wikwihagararaho ngo wirengagize amarangamutima y’agahinda: Kubabara nyuma yo gutandukana n’umukunzi ni ibintu bisanzwe, ugomba kumenya ko uri umuntu kandi amarangamutima yose y’agahinda, umujinya, akababaro n’ibindi ukabyakira ukareka kwigira nk’aho nta kibazo gihari.Emera kubabara. Ntukihutire "gukomeza" ubuzima vuba nk’aho ntacyabaye.

Gerageza kudakomeza guhura nawe: Kimwe mu bintu bigoye gukomeza ni ugukomeza guhura n’uwahoze ari umukunzi wawe. Guhora uhura nawe bituma bikugora gukira no kumwikuramo vuba. Niba bishoboka, ni byiza kwiha umwanya ukareka gukomeza kuvugana nawe cyane, ibi bizaguha amahirwe yo kugenda wikuramo ibyahise vuba maze utangire ubuzima bushya.

Ibande ku kwiyitaho: Mu bihe bikomeye by’akababaro, ni ngombwa kwibanda ku kwiyitaho, ukanita ku marangamutima yawe. Koresha umwanya wewe mu bikorwa biguha amahoro y’umutima, ndetse bigushimisha bigatuma wumva umerewe neza, nko gukora siporo, kurya neza, kuruhuka bihagije n’ibindi. Kwita ku buzima bwawe bizagufasha cyane, aho kwirirwa ureba amafoto ye urira, witera agahinda.

Ikindi ni ugukunda kuba hamwe n’abantu ukunda:Wishingikirize ku ncuti cyangwa umuryango kugira ngo bagufashe kumva umerewe neza. Kuba hafi y’abantu bakuzamura bakagutera inkunga bishobora guhindura byinshi. Kuganira ku byiyumvo byawe n’abantu bakwitayeho bizakwibutsa ko ukunzwe kandi ufite agaciro, na nyuma yo gutandukana n’uwo mwakundanaga.

Tekereza ku mpamvu mwatandukanye:Gutandukana n’umukunzi wawe bishobora kukubabaza cyane, ariko na none gutekereza ku buryo mwari mubanye bishobora kugufasha gukira vuba. Gusobanukirwa n'impamvu umubano wanyu warangiye bishobora gutuma witekerezaho maze ukabona ku n’ubundi urukundo rwanyu rutari kuzaramba.Bikagufasha kumenya ko kuba mwatandukanye ari byiza kuri wowe maze wite ku biguha amahoro kandi ntibikubabarize amarangamutima.

Ikindi ni uko iyo bikabije cyane, bishobora no kukuviramo ibyago byo kurwara indwara z’agahinda gakabije. Niba urwana no kwikuramo uwahoze ari umukunzi wawe cyangwa bikagorana guhangana n'amarangamutima yawe, kujya kwa muganga cyangwa umujyanama bishobora kugufasha.

Ni byiza kumenya ko ubuzima bwawe bwo mu mutwe ari ingenzi, niba rero ubona bikabije, icyiza ni ukujya kwamuganga maze bakagufasha gukira vuba.

Gutandukana n’umukunzi wawe ntibyoroshye, ariko nukurikiza izi ntambwe zose kandi zoroshye bizagufasha gukira vuba no gukomeza ubuzima.Wibuke ko buri ntambwe igana imbere, niyo yaba ari nto ariko ifite icyo izagufasha. Nturi wenyine, kandi hamwe n’igihe, uzumva ufite imbaraga kandi witeguye kwakira ibyabaye maze ukomeze ubuzima.