Uko wahakanira mu kinyabupfura umuntu ushaka ko mukundana

Niba ugiye guhakanira umuntu, ugomba kuvugisha ukuri ariko kudakomeretsa, kandi bikoreshe ijwi n’amagambo atarimo agasuzuguro, ahubwo umwubahe. 

Dore uburyo bwiza wahakanira umuntu ushaka ko mukundana, ariko utamukomerekeje nk’uko tubikesha ikinyamakuru The Wellness Corner:

Mbere na mbere ba inyangamugayo kandi uvugishe ukuri, ntukagire umuntu ubeshya, cyane cyane mu rukundo. 

Kubeshywa mu rukundo ni ikintu kibabaza cyane, ndetse kikagira n’ingaruka ku mitekerereze n’amarangamutima y’umuntu. Hari abibwira ko kubwiza umuntu ukuri byamubabaza ndetse bikanatuma ubucuti bari bafitanye bwangirika, nyamara ibi sibyo.

Niba umuntu agusabye ko mukundana, ukabona bidashoboka, ni byiza kureka kumubeshya ahubwo ukamubwiza ukuri nubwo kubabaza.

Ikindi ni uko ugomba kwibuka gushimira uwo muntu: Kuba uwo muntu agukunda, ndetse agufitiye amarangamutima y’urukundo, ashaka ko mukundana, ugomba kubiha agaciro, ukamwereka ko ubyishimiye nubwo bidashobotse, aho guhita umubwira ngo “ntabwo mbishaka," ibi bishobora kugaragara nk’agasuzuguro. Nyamara iyo ubanje kumushimira, bituma byibuze abona ko wita ku marangamutima y’abandi.

Na none kandi, musobanurire impamvu bidashobotse ko mukundana: Gutanga ibisobanuro ni byiza cyane kuko bituma adatekereza ibindi, ashobora gukeka ko umwanze kubera impamvu runaka, kandi atari zo. Ni byiza rero kumusobanurira kandi ukamubwiza ukuri. Urugero ushobora kumubwira ko ufite undi, cyangwa utiteguye kujya mu rukundo.

Ikindi ni uko mu byo uvuga byose, ugomba kwirinda gushinja cyangwa amagambo akomeretsa. Ahubwo uvugane ikinyabupfura, umwubahe, kandi umuhe umwanya uhagije wo kukugaragariza amarangamutima ye yose, kandi uzirikane ko ibyiyumvo bye bifite ishingiro ari yo mpamvu bigomba kubahwa.

Ikindi ni uko ugomba kubanza kwitondera aho ubimubwiriye, si byiza ko ubivugira ahantu rusange, cyangwa ku karubanda. Ahubwo ni byiza kubimubwira muri mwenyine, ahantu hatuje kandi heza. Ibi ni mu rwego rwo kumurinda kumva afite ipfunwe ry’uko hari undi wabyumvise. Witondere igihe n'ahantu:

Guhakanira umuntu ushaka ko mukundana bishobora kukugora, cyane cyane iyo musanzwe muri incuti.

Ariko aho kumubeshya urukundo, ni byiza ko umubwiza ukuri kugira ngo hirindwe agahinda ko mu gihe kizaza. Niba rero wiyemeje kubimubwira, ni byiza kumwubaha no kumubwiza ukuri ariko kutamukomeretsa.