Umuntu mwakundanye bya nyabyo, kumukatira ntibyoroha kubera gutinya kumubabaza, cyangwa se kwibaza uko azabyakira.
Abantu benshi bakomeza kwizirika ku rukundo n’ubwo amarangamutima yabo yaba aberekeza ahandi kubera impuhwe cyangwa ubwoba bwo kubabaza uwo bakundaga.
Ariko ukuri ni uko gukomeza kubeshya umuntu urukundo rutagihari, bishobora kuzamubabaza kurushaho igihe abimenye.
Niba nawe uri kwibaza uti: “Ni gute namubwira ko ntakimukunda ntamubabaje?” dore ibintu byagufasha kubikora mu buryo bwiza, kandi wubashye urukundo n’amarangamutima agufitiye, nk’uko tubikesha ikinyamakuru WikiHow.
1Banza wibaze koko niba utakimukunda
Mbere yo kugira icyo ubwira umukunzi wawe, banza wisuzume neza. Ese koko urukundo rwarashize? Cyangwa ni ukumurambirwa by’akanya gato, uburakari cyangwa ibibazo by’igihe gito?
Ntukihutire gufata icyemezo kubera amarangamutima y’akanya gato. Ariko kandi niba umaze igihe kinini wumva ibyiyumviro wari umufitiye bitakiri byabindi, ni byiza kubyemera aho gukomeza kubeshya.
2. Hitamo igihe n’ahantu heza ho kubivugira
Ibi si ibintu byo kuvugira mu butumwa bugufi, mwarakaranyije cyangwa muri kuganira bisanzwe. Gerageza kubona umwanya mwiza wo kuganira mutuje, nta rusaku, ndetse mutarakaranyije.
Kuganira imbonankubone bigaragaza icyubahiro n’ubunyamwuga mu rukundo, kandi kubivugaho mutarakaranyije bifasha gutuma yumva ko utamwanze kubera ko yakubabaje, cyangwa kubera uburakari umufitiye.
3. Mubwize ukuri, ariko ubivuge umwubashye
Hari amagambo ashobora kumukomeretsa cyane, ayo rero ugomba kuyirinda. Wimuvugisha nk’aho ari umuntu wanga, ukubangamiye, cyangwa ngo umwihenureho. Icy’ingenzi ni ukwibuka ko n’ubwo utakimukunda, hari igihe wamaraga amajoro kuri telefoni muvugana, ibyo rero ugomba kubyubaha.
Ikindi ni uko ugomba kumubwiza ukuri aho kumuhoza mu gihirahiro, umubeshya urukundo rutagihari.
4. Ntumushinje amakosa yose
Hari abantu bajya gukatira abakunzi babo bakabigira nk’aho mugenzi wabo ari we mubi, kugira ngo bumve bafite impamvu zihagije zo kumureka. Ibyo birababaza cyane.
N’ubwo yaba yarakoze amakosa, ni byiza kutamuvugaho ibintu bimutesha agaciro cyangwa bimwumvisha ko nta cyo amaze, kuko nawe ntuba uri miseke igoroye. Ibyiza ni ukuganira, mugasabana imbabazi, kandi mugatandukana nta n’umwe usigaranye intimba ku mutima.
5. Muhe umwanya wo kubabara mu gihe bibaye ngombwa
Ukuri kurababaza. Nta buryo na bumwe bwo gutandukana budasiga agahinda ku muntu wagukundaga by’ukuri. Ntukitege ko azabifata neza, cyangwa ngo abyakire ako kanya. Ariko nanone kumubwiza ukuri biruta gukomeza kumubeshya urukundo rutakiriho.
6. Irinde kumuha ibyiringiro bidahari
Hari benshi babeshya ngo “nkeneye akanya ko kwitekerezaho, ariko nimera neza tuzasubirana.” Ariko ibi ni amakosa akomeye cyane, niba koko uzi neza ko utakimukunda, bimubwire kuko ibyiringiro bizatuma akomeza kugutegereza.
Icyiza ni ukumubwiza ukuri, hanyuma amarangamutima yakongera kubahuza, mugasubirana, ariko utaramuziritse ku cyizere kiraza amasinde.
Kubwira umuntu ko utakimukunda ntabwo byoroshye, cyane cyane iyo ubizi neza ko we agukunda cyane. Ariko rimwe na rimwe ukuri kuvuzwe mu bwitonzi ni byo byubaka kandi bigaha amahoro umutima w’umuntu kurusha gukomeza kumubeshya.
Niba warabuze aho uhera ubimubwira, tangirira ku kwibwiza ukuri, uhe agaciro umwanya n’amarangamutima bya mugenzi wawe, kandi ubikore mu bwitonzi. Kuko nubwo umutima ushobora kubabara uyu munsi, ukuri gufasha abantu gukira no gukomeza ubuzima mu mahoro.