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Dore ibyo wabwira umugabo uguca inyuma – Ibibazo 8 wamubaza

Yanditswe na: Kwizera jean de Dieu
Taliki:16/11/2020 7:20
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Uko byagenda kose n'uko byaba byakozwemo kose, uzababara numenya ko umugabo wawe yaguciye inyuma. Icya mbere ntiwabimushinja kuko nta kimenyetso ufite. Nta n'icyo wakora ngo abyemere. Niba uzi ikiza kuri wowe wikwivuna ngo witeshe umutwe kuko si byiza. Dore ibibazo uzamubaza mwitonze muganira nk'uko tubikesha Psych2go.



Ese ni gute wahangana n’ikibazo cyo kuba umugabo wawe ari kuguca inyuma?

Gucana inyuma biraba cyane mu buzima. Byangiza imibano ya bamwe mu batuye isi. Uko waba wita ku mugabo wawe kose ashobora kwisanga yaguciye inyuma, niba umugabo wawe ashukika byoroshye rero nta kabuza azajya aguca inyuma bimworoheye. Niba ukunda gucibwa inyuma n’uwo mwashakanye icyo wowe ukwiriye gukora ni ugutekereza ubufasha ubwo ari bwo bwose wamuha.

Ese wowe ntihaba hari icyo ukeneye gukora? Ese urashaka gukomeza kuryoshya umubano wanyu? Ok ! Ni byiza cyane! Urashaka kuwurangiriza aho ngaho ugeze ? Nabyo ni byiza. Icy’ingenzi ni uko wowe usesengura neza icyo ushaka witonze ku buryo ejo utazicuza. Niba uzi neza icyo ushaka ni wo mwanya wo gutekereza ku kigiye gukurikira.

Dore amagambo wabwira umugabo uguca inyuma

Shakisha ukuri. Iki ni cyo kintu cya mbere wakorera umutima ugukunda. Ugomba kumenya neza mbere na mbere niba koko umugabo wawe warahiriye kugukunda iteka cyangwa wagukunze akabikubwira agiye kugusimbuza akakuvana mu hazaza he cyangwa niba ari ibinyoma wabwiwe. 

Niba wamaze kumenya ukuri rero niwo mwanya wo guhumuriza umugabo wawe, ukamwereka amarangamutima yawe y’ako kanya. Birumvikana niba utazi uburyo wabikora, ni cyo iyi nkuru twayiteguriye. Iyi nkuru iragufasha kumenya amagambo wavuga mu gihe wegereye umugabo wawe uguca inyuma.

Icyambere, ugomba kwiga kuvuga utuje kandi wiyizeye. Niba ugira umujinya cyangwa umushiha birumvikana kandi ni ibintu bisanzwe bibaho, ariko wibuke ko utagomba kuba Debande ku mugabo wawe. Nubikora gutyo ubudebande bwawe ntaho bugeza ikiganiro mu giye kugirana. Ngaho dore ibyo ukwiriye kuvuga:

1.      Vuga ku byiyumviro byawe

Icyambere kandi cy’ingenzi , ugomba kumwereka amarangamutima yawe yose. Mwereke uburyo yakubabaje, nawe azahita yumva yigaye. Ntuhite umurakarira, yobora amarangamutima yawe kandi uvuge ibyawe ushize amanga.

2.      Mubaze impamvu yabikoze

Ngaho mu bwire agire icyo abivuga ho.Mubaze icya muteye kuguca inyuma.Aha ashobora kuzahita agushyira mu majwi nk’umwe muri nyirabayazana yo kuguca inyuma.Menya neza ko ntanahamwe aguhishe cyangwa akubeshye, mbese ikibazo muri ku cyikemurira kijyemo neza rero.Kandi numenya ko wabigizemo uruhare , uhagarike ikiganiro ujye kwikora.

3.      Mubaze niba ntacyo byari bimutwaye kuguca inyuma

Mubaze niba yaragutekerezaga ubwo yagucaga inyuma. Mubaze niba yari azi neza ko ibyo ari gukora bizakubabaza. Ibi bibazo bizagufasha kumenya ubwikunde bw’umugabo wawe.

4.      Tandukanya ibisobanuro ukeneye n’ibyo udakeneye

Ntago ukeneye kumenya akantu ku kandi.Ukeneye kumenya iby’aho hafi y’ikibazo gusa.Ariko ntukeneye kumenya nibidafite umumaro kuko byakubabariza umutima.Mwereke ukuri kose wamenye umwereke naho yaguhishe.

5.      Mubaze icyo yumva akeneye kugira ngo mukomeze ubuzima

Mubaze uti”Ese urifuza ko nyuma y’ibi byose byabaye hakurikira ho iki hagati yanjye nawe?” Mureke amenye ko ari we bireba.

6.      Mubaze niba yiteguye kunga umubano wanyu

Mwereke ko agiye gushyiramo imbaraga nyinshi kugira ngo asubiranye ibyo yangije byose.Niwe nyirabayazana ni nawe ukwiye kubyubaka

7.      Mubaze uti ”Ese kuki watekereje ko nzakureka tukagumana?”

Nyuma, ukeneye ku mu bwira akaguha impamvu yanyayo yatuma uhaguma. Kuguca inyuma yari impamvu yo ku kwigizayo.Niba ashaka ko mu gumana rero agomba kuguha indi mpamvu yanyayo ituma uhaguma

8.      Genzura ibyiyumviro byawe

Mubwire ko ukeneye umwanya wo kwita kubyiyumviro byawe. Ntamwanzuro numwe yemerewe gufatira ho, ni wowe wababajwe , ni nawe ugomba kumuha ibyo agomba guhitamo.Ushobora no kumubwira ko ari wowe uzamuha umwanzuro wo gukomezanya cyangwa gutandukana. Ese bigeze baguca inyuma ? Niba ari Yego se  Wabyitwayemo gute ? Cyangwa hari uwo uzi byabaye ho?






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