Kigali

Amagambo 14 umugabo adakwiriye kubwira umugore we n’iyo baba bari mu bihe bibi

Yanditswe na: Kaliza Liliane
Taliki:13/06/2018 11:45
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Bijya bibaho ko mu buzima bwa buri munsi tubayeho, bamwe mu bashakanye bashobora kugira ibyo batumvikanaho bikaba byavamo n’intonganya kugeza aho umwe akomeretsa mugenzi we kandi bitari ngombwa.



Ahanini rero abahanga bavuga ko abagabo ari bo batungwa agatoki mu kuba aba mbere bababaza abo bashakanye bakoresheje amagambo mabi. Ni nayo mpamvu twahisemo kubabwira amwe mu magambo umugabo adakwiriye kubwira umugore we kabona n’iyo baba bari mu bihe bitabemerera gusabana nk'uko bari basanzwe bameze.

Dore amwe muri ayo magambo adakwiriye kuvugwa n’umugabo

Ntujya unshimisha na gato: Aho kugira ngo ubwire umugore wawe ko atajya agushimisha gutyo, birashoboka ko byaba ari byo koko ariko aho kumubwira utyo shaka ukundi kuntu ubimubwira ariko udakoresheje iryo jambo kuko bibabaza kuryumva no kuryakira, birashoboka ko ubona ko atagushimisha rwose ariko na we ntako aba atagize ngo ashake uko yagushimisha, bityo si byiza guhita ubivuga utyo ahubwo shaka ukundi kuntu wabigoragoza ubimubwire bitamukomerekeje.

Sinjya nemera ko nashakanye nawe: Birashoboka cyane ko ibyo uvuga ari ukuri kuzima ariko burya kubibwira umugore wawe gutyo ntacyo bizamuhinduraho niba atakwitwaraho neza ahubwo bizarushaho kumukomeretsa, ibyiza rero ni uko iryo jambo warimira burundu ntirizasohoke mu kanwa kawe niba wanaritekerezaga kuko rishobora kugusenyera burundu nk'uko abahanga babivuga.

Warahindutse: Aho kugira ngo ukoreshe ijambo guhinduka gerageza ushake irindi ririsimbura kuko iryo rityaye cyane aho kukubakira abahanga mu bijyanye n’imibanire basanze ryagusenyera, niba hari ibyo umubonaho yahindutseho gerageza ushake uko ubimubwira abikosore ariko udakoresheje ijambo guhinduka.

Umugore wa runaka ateye atya, agira umutima umeze utya: Ibyo bizatuma umugore wawe agutakariza icyizere yibwire ko umuca inyuma kandi utarabyigeze, ntukamuganirize ku bagore b’abandi.

Niba unkunda, gira utya: Bene ayo magambo ntakwiriye kubwirwa umugore wawe kuko asa n’amupfobya, amwereka ko nta gaciro afite imbere yawe, mwerurire umubwize ukuri umubwire kugukorera iki cyangwa kiriya aho kumubwira ngo niba agukunda nagire atya.

Urabizi ko ari njye wafashe iya mbere nkubwira ko ngukunda: Niba ubona ko umugore wawe afite gahunda yo kuguca inyuma cyangwa akigendera ku mpamvu runaka, si ngombwa kumubwira ayo magambo kuko arabizi neza ko ari wowe wabanje kumubwira ko umukunda.

Oya, ntabwo njyana nawe: Iri jambo ribabaza umugore ku buryo utabasha kumva, niba koko utifuza ko mujyana hari andi magambo meza wakoresha utamuteye ubwoba cyangwa ngo umubabaze bingana gutyo, kuko ibyo bimwereka ko utanezezwa no kujyana na we cyangwa se ko ntacyo avuze imbere yawe, ntukamubwire amagambo ahakana gusa ahubwo ujye unamwemerera mu gihe ubona ari ngombwa.

Sinkwishimira nk'uko nishimira abana banjye: Iryo jambo ribabaza umugore ku buryo bukomeye, kumubwira ko unezezwa n’abana kumurusha kandi baramukomotseho ni ukumukomeretsa.

Nkubone hanze: Iryo jambo riteye isoni kuribwira umugore mumaranye imyaka n’imyaniko mubanye neza akubaha ndetse yita ku rugo no ku bana bawe ugatinyuka ukamubwira ngo nkubone hanze nk'aho ari itungo ubwira. Fata umwanya ubanze utekereze ku magambo ugiye kumubwira hato utazisenyera bitari ngombwa.

Mbona abantu bo mu muryango wawe ari abasazi bose: Umugore wese aho ava akagera ntiyihanganira umuntu wavuga nabi umuryango we wamureze ukaba waramubonye akuze, ubaha umuryango we nk'uko yubaha uwawe ni byo bizakubakira.

Ndabizi ko ntari intungane: Ntuzakine ubwira umugore wawe ijambo rigupfobya gutyo kuko n’ubundi birazwi neza ko nta ntungane ibaho ariko buri wese akora uko ashoboye kugira ngo agaragare neza imbere ya mugenzi we, aho kumubwira ko utari intungane, shaka icyo wakora kimwereka ko n'ubwo utari yo ariko ugerageza guhinduka.

Umeze nka runaka: Ntuzigere na rimwe ugereranya umugore wawe n’undi muntu uwo ari we wese cyane cyane umubwira ko ari mubi kuko byamubabaza kurusha uko wamubwira amakosa umubonaho aho kumugereranya n’undi muntu.

Oya ntago bikomeye rwose, ntacyo bitwaye: Nubwira umugore wawe gutyo kandi we abona neza ko bigikomeye, bizamwereka ko utajya umwumva na rimwe ahubwo uhora umupfobya.

Ntabwo bigoye kugutunga wowe: Iryo jambo ryereka umugore ko arushwa agaciro n’amafaranga kuko uba ushatse kumwereka ko atagoye cyane ndetse ko ari we nomero ya mbere ahubwo wifitiye abo utunga kumurusha. Ikindi kintu kiza kizabafasha kubana neza ni uko buri umwe yandika urutonde rw’amagambo atifuza kubwirwa na mugenzi we, nimumara kuyamenya mwembi muyazibukire bizabafasha kubana neza ndetse urugo rwanyu rubabere ijuru rito.

Src: santeplusmag.com






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Kaliza Liliane

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