Mu buzima busanzwe ku bagabo mbere yo gukora ubukwe baba bameze nk’abahigi kuko bakoresha imbaraga zabo zose uko zishoboka ngo bemeze abagore babo bakabereka ko ari ab’agaciro k’ikirenga kuri bo. Ikibabaza abagore benshi ni uko nyuma y’ubukwe bamaze kubana na ba bagabo bigoranye ko bakomeza kugaragaza za mbaraga bahoranye mbere.
Igikunze kugaragara kenshi ku bagabo bamaze kubaka ingo zabo ni uko bagabanya imbaraga bagiraga mu kwereka urukundo abagore babo kandi ari byo byatumaga abagore babo bumva ko bafite agaciro kihariye ku bagabo babo, bikabagaragariza ko bakunzwe koko.
Nk’uko tubikesha urubuga capital, twateguriye abasomyi ba Inyarwanda.com ibintu icumi na bitanu (15) byafasha umugabo kwigarurira umutima w’umugore we akawiyegurira kandi akamwereka ko akunzwe byihariye no mu gihe mwaba mwaramaze kubana, ibyo bintu ni ibi bikurikira;
1.Mubwire kenshi iri jambo “Ndagukunda” n’ubwo mutaba mugiye gukora urukundo, umugore wawe akwiye kubwirwa ko umukunda kuko urukundo ntirukorwa gusa.
2.Mukoreho, mufate mu mayunguyungu, mufate ibiganza ubikomeze, jya ukunda kumufata umuturutse inyuma kandi umutunguye kuko abagore benshi bakunda gufatwa, gukorwaho n’abagabo babo.
3.Jya ukunda kumuganiriza umubaze utubazo twa hato na hato, ibi byereka umugore ko umwitayeho, ushaka kumenye ibimwerekeyeho kandi bakunda cyane gufungira abo bakunda, bikarushaho kubabera byiza gufungukira uwo babona abafitiye amatsiko cyane.
4.Mukorere ibirenze ibyo yiteguye ko umukorera. Kora ibirenze intekerezo ze, niba anagusabye kumuha ubufasha renza ku byo yagusabye ndetse n’iyo we atagusaba kumufasha, gira ikintu umukorera azabona ko urenze abandi kandi wihariye unamwitayeho.
5.Murebe cyane mu maso umwitayeho usa n’umwibazaho kandi ufite inseko mu maso hawe. Ibyo bizereka umugore ko yitaweho cyane kandi akunzwe, kumureba ubwabyo bikunyura, bityo bimutere kurushaho kugukunda.
6.Jya unyuzamo umutere imitoma, umwoherereze ubutumwa bumunezeza kandi burimo ibitekerezo bizima, umubwire uburyo akunezeza ndetse atuma umererwa neza. Abagore bakunda gushaka udushya, namenyako ibyo akora bikunezeza azarushaho kubizanamo udushya bibe byiza cyane.
7.Muhamagare hagati mu munsi umutunguye, mugirane ikiganiro kigufi ariko kiri bumusige anezerewe. Umunsi we uzaba uwugize mwiza byongere urukundo agufitiye.
8.Vuga ku rukundo rwanyu n’uburyo myihariye ndetse n’iyo mwaba muri mu bandi bantu. Ibi bizereka umugore wawe ko utewe ishema no kuba ari uwawe, bimutere kurushaho kukubaha no kugukunda.
9.Gira icyo uvuga kuri we, uko asa, uko agaragara, uko yambaye, imico ye n’ibindi. Niba yambaye neza mbere y’uko ava mu rugo ba uwa mbere umubwira ko yambaye neza, niba yatunganyije imisatsi cyangwa inzara, ntiwifate mubwire ko asa neza abandi bagabo batazagutanga gutaka uburanga bw’umugore wawe.
10.Musohokane nk’uko wabikoraga mbere ugitangira kumutereta. Yego, birakwiye ko utereta umugore wawe mubana. Ibi bizamwereka ko uhora umubona nk’uwihariye kuri wowe kandi ukimufitiye urukundo koko.
11.Mugaragarize urukundo nk’uko wabikoraga mbere, mukine udukino tworoheje tw’abakundana, umushimishe kandi umugurire impano. Gutanga impano ku mukunzi wawe ntibisaba ibya mirenge, oya. Umutima ukunze ni wo wa mbere, ukamenya ibyo akunda biba bihagije. Abagore burya banezezwa n’utuntu duto tworoheje kandi bagakunda ubakorera ikintu abatunguye cyane.
12.Mwite utuzina twiza tw’urukundo nka “Rukundo rwanjye”, “Kamikazi kanjye”,… ntumwite amazina atamwubaha nka “Yee mugore”, “Umva ye madaaa”, “Maman kanaka” n’ubwo abenshi bakunze gukoresha “Maman w’abana” burya umugore wawe nawe aba akumbuye kumva umwita utuzina turyoshye.
13.Ba ari wowe umutera kugushaka, mushotore umutere gushaka ko mukora urukundo. Umugore ashobora kwitinya akagira isoni zo kwereke umugabo we ko ashaka ko batera akabariro. Wowe mugabo fata iya mbere umutinyure, azagufungukira kandi abikore anezerewe.
14.Zirikana cyane amwe mu matariki y’ingenzi cyane kuri we. Ntuzibagire isabukuru ye y’amavuko ndetse n’indi minsi yizihiza yihariye ku buzima bwe, bityo ujye umufasha kuyizihiza bimwereke ko umuzirikana cyane.
15.Mugaragaze, umwerekane mu bandi ko ari umugore wawe. Ibi bizatuma arushaho kukwizera anagukunde kuko bizamwereka ko udatewe ipfunwe no kuba umufite.
Ushobora kwibaza impamvu yo gukorera umugore wawe ibi byose ukumva ntayo! Utekereje neza impamvu wayumva, iya mbere ni ukubera urukundo ukunda umugore wawe kandi abagore bakunda kwitabwaho n’abagabo babo ndetse bakanabareberaho. Niba ukunze umugore wawe ukanabimwereka, bizamutera ishyaka ryo kugukunda cyane nawe kandi abikugaragarize.
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TANGA IGITECYEREZO